I wna know what love is.

this post is long and totally random dont read it if ure not interested :)



You can’t find something when you don’t know what you’re looking for
You’re playing the field
Hoping that somebody will want you,
when its you who needs to figure it out what is it that you want.
Anybody can fall in love,
but what you deserve is a man with the emotional maturity to stay in love
Don’t settle for a boyfriend when you can demand a man-friend.
or else you’re going to get seriously hurt out there.

true?

sometimes i wonder why does people wna fall in love,

when all you get in the end is heartache accompanied with tears.
why wanna get involved in relationship,
letting others affect your emotions.. especially during arguements..
some may say that at least thrs someone for you when youre feeling really down and all.
but to what extent? do you really need them? or gfs can jst make it right.
do you really tell them whats wrong.
some dont even bother to try to make it better for you.
they will just say things like

: aiya ,dont think too much la. things are gonna be fine. : dont think about it already la, ok? etc etc
but of course, i know it doesn't applies to all. so yeh.
& one more thing i came to realise
and thats how scary a person can change over time.
as in like a short time.
how they can say they love you today, and the nxt thing u know,
he just ignore you like you dont exist.

and for some cases, they can say i love you, only you.
but you found out that he's saying that to others too.
how shitty can this be right?
love is like sand, if you hold on too tightly , it will slip through your fingers. but if you dont hold on to what you have, it will just be gone with the wind.

when you got ditched, you will try means and ways to get him back.
but only to realise that no matter how hard you try, things aint gonna change.
while you are trying to hold on, all he did was letting go.
people keeps telling you, be strong, everything is gonna be fine. all u need is time.
we'll just nod our head, and say yes yes yes. cause yes, what else can we say?
and then you wake up the nxt morning, 2nd morning , 3rd morning so and so,
telling yourself : okay. he is not in my life anymore.
but whenever the phone rings, a text recieved, you'd rush to ur fone, hoping and thinking
that it will be his name that is flashing on the screen.
you will check him out on fb, ok, stalking.
and when you log in to msn, you will see if he's online.
if he's nt, you'll be thinking whrs he ? etc etc
and if he is online, you hope he'll talk to you.
but more often than not, he's not gna do it.
you'll have the urge to talk to him, but just control.
cause its alr bad enuff that he didnt initiate the conver,
and whats worse is that you start the conver but he's not replying. yes, no?
its like broken glasses, if you try to piece it tgtr, you are just gna hurt yourself.

and as time pass by, you started to do less of these things.
you try to occupy yourself, try to fall for someone else ( for some ppl )
& gradually, you'll stop expecting.
you wont cry anymore while looking through photos of you and him
and those sweet nothings he used to send.
you take in deep breath and smile.
when the other person comes along, you enjoy the times w him
and think to urself that : great , i think i am over it.
but sometimes, when you go to places that holds memories of you and ur ex,
you can't help but to feel sad/weird in one way or another.
and sometimes, comparisons are made.
bad.

have you ever felt that you're moving on with your life,
but actually youre not going anywhr ?
or sometimes when you're determined to move on,
they just, comes back.
so you'll be thinking that maybe if you just stay a lil while more,
he would be back.
you dont dare to move on because youre afraid that he might be back.
you still hold on to that little tinge of hope.
because of the things he says and stuffs he do.
love comes to those who least expected it.
the more you want it, the further it goes .
and when you dont care about it, it just comes back.
its like a cycle.

ure about to give it up --> he comes back -- > ure falling for it again ---> he dont care anymore
we always ignore those who cares for us and cares for those who ignores us.

ok, so lets say you are rly over him
do you think that you can really be good friends w him aft that?
as in really good friend/best friend etc etc.
does it matter how long both of you *chilled off* aft the breakup?
some yes , some no.
but whatever the case is.
you'll still be there whenever he needs a listening ear,
someone to hear him out, someone to be thr for him..
even if whatever he tells you hurts you,
you will just hide your feelings and
be there.
on the other hand,
you'll feel happy ,
thinking that its you that he confide in.

sometimes when you're down,
you'll just have the urge to talk to him.
even when you know that maybe he wont say stufs to make you feel btr,
or that the stufs he said is gna cliche.
but you still wna talk to him,
because somehow, it just makes you feel a lil better.
even when he doesn't say anything,
so long as he is by your side,
you just feel,
better..

__

as i said,
this is totally random
iam not emo.!
i ate alot today.
for this, i am emo! lol
im eatg orange now!
sourrrr
omg